ok let’s face facts i’m in a rut faced with lots of rejection, animosity, jealousy and abandonment. i have new albums coming out, a new tour, a huge kickstarter amount to raise, even a family to start. and there’s part of me that wants to cave in and collapse but i’m reading this western book, all about cowboys and pioneers heading west, finding their ways, and i can’t help but feel that even when you’re at your lowest, that it might not be the end but the beginning of the story.
i honestly feel like i’ll bounce back in a big way, and maybe no one else believes it, but i do. i honestly believe in never giving up, never surrendering to your own worst fears. a lot of you hear me and understand what i’m talking about, you feel it too. this isn’t the end of the story guys, this is the shitty part where we’re farm boys and we can’t even fathom that it’s us that blows up the death star. it’s us.
everyday you guys remind me of what an amazing group of fans i have, you lift my spirits and slap me silly with the obvious truths of my career. i help you and you help me. and if this helped you, i’m glad. we’re all in this together.
some people hate honesty, sadness, weakness, depression. it’s not cool, it’s not fun, and it’s not an escape from the similar things that they face, but that will never stop me from being real, because for every five folks that say, quit whining and shut up faggot, there are thousands that need to find a new way of thinking and sometimes what i say can set them on that path.
you guys always remind me that i’m the one forging the trail that others ride on, i’m the one sticking his neck out. and it’s scary to be out in the front of the wagon train scouting for the adversity of antagonists and the calm of future campsites. but it’s where i belong. sometimes i don’t like it but it’s where i’m meant to be. and it can lonesome out here in the front, but i don’t think i could just hang in the back and follow others. i can only do what i’m here to do. and in a way it’s already paid off. because you’re here reading this and understanding my purpose in life. and you can see that even i don’t know where we’re going sometimes. but i hope you’re glad that i never get off my horse, i keep riding. I hope that gives you some sense that some things never change. and mc chris is one of them.